Why do we want the unavailable?

I do not like to speak much of the actualities especially because the current situation with the pandemic makes me nauseous. Still, I got some thoughts which were triggered mainly by the ongoing scenario and I felt them worthy to be shared with you here.

Social distancing and quarantining becoming advisable or mandatory on each corners of the Globe, with those comes the struggle of not having any social life. Wait a second.

Did we have social life or more of a virtually social but physically present companionship?

Earlier when walking down the street, I would see groups sitting together with little to no communication not to mention eye contact. I would observe groups to pass through dinners, lunches, anniversary, birthday or other celebrations without seeing the event with their own eyes. They have recoded them and registered them through the screen of their phones.

There was less conversation more texting, chatting, commenting, liking, tweeting…and we seamed all fine conversing in these modern and distant ways.

We all have enjoyed the virtual space and were keen to share our experiences first on social media rather than sharing with the ones present with us.

When sitting together we had our heads down, each of us typing rapidly or watching random contents and giggling solo.

A good post couldn’t be missed and scrolling was / is an unconscious finger movement.

What happens now when we must be virtual and we can’t have physical contact? When after a few days of avoidance, you finally crave to look into someone's eyes, pat their shoulders, automatically reach for a handshake and lean in for a hug.

While some get creative and throw balcony parties, group coffee dates and virtual concerts (I love to see these Guys and Girls, they really got it going) others sit at home doomed by what seamed the norm just few weeks earlier.

Why do we want something different than what's presented to us? And why do we punish ourselves by seeking the unavailable? This is common question which I can ask related to many scenarios and topics. These days, it came to my mind oftentimes regarding the required social distancing.

I wish to start you up with my questions however you will need to work out the answers. Make them meaningful and sustainable. You got some time at your hand.

Challenging periods can serve us great deductions.

My hope is: that through this event, we learn to appreciate good company and when we meet again, we put our phones down; start having a conversation and while we sit together, we look into each other’s eyes and for that time, just appreciate having each other shoulder by shoulder.

I won’t list the commonly shared advises how to and what to do while at home rather, I wish you all to find your path to stay healthy, mindful and above all, footloose in your spirits.


Photos by Ian Espinosa and Elizaveta Korabelnikova

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